Love and Marriage

I want to apologize for a couple of things:

1) Being incredibly boring. I've learned that happy=boring, and although I'd rather be happy and boring, it's not really helping my ambition of becoming a writer, is it? You'll just have to deal with it though, b/c our life together has finally reached that point where we've been trying to be since we met. A place of our own, by ourselves. It's happiness, plain and simple... minus that monthly PMDD (google it, I have it) and time when we can't afford our prescriptions.

2) Not updating as usual. We're on our own now, meaning we have to work...all the freaking time. I still love my job, and DH loves his, although we wake up, go to work, stay there for 12-13 hours, come home, go to bed...repeat. Every now and then we shower or cook, and right now cleaning is reserved for the weekend...only thanks to DH not wanting to live in squalor. Me? I don't mind. Until the mum and mom come to visit, that is.

I suppose that's it. Basically we're just too busy. We did have an entire weekend to be nice and talk to our friends and family, but to be honest we spent it lying around, cleaning, and lying around watching the snow outside. Tonight DH is out to Home Depot to get some things to fix our shower (the water pressure slams you into a wall) and sink (he touched a pipe and it broke, landlord says it's our fault, we pay) and to get a few groceries. I've been suffering from PMDD (again, google it!) and feeling down, so DH has stepped up to make sure we're taken care of.

Hopefully I can check in sooner than later, take care!

Snow, D.C., and Catnip

Howdy-Ho strangers,

It has been quite an experience over the past few weeks, juggling with work, Pete's jobs, trying to keep a tidy apartment, and pleasing two used-to-be-outdoor kitties while it is snowing outside. Of course, we're still very happy, with each other, ourselves, and our surroundings; but also a bit excited at all of this adult stuff we get to do now... like, cleaning the bathroom and cooking dinner after working a 12 hour day.

I can't tell you how happy I am to see Pete's pride bursting out of him over having a place of his own now (and of course a beautiful wife to share it with, if I do say so myself, ahem). I came home from work one day and found the apartment vaccuumed, tidied, and he was mopping the bathroom floor! Wow, if I had known he did all that stuff, I would have married him sooner! Joking, I'm really the lazy one and Pete is great at the housework. I'm better at laundry, cooking, and doing the shopping (I clip coupons!). He's best at kitty box cleaning, bathroom cleaning, and floor cleaning... oh and decorating as well. He's quite a decorator when it comes to his own place. He has all these ideas of what we need, where it should go, and what projects will let him bring out his man tools and hammer things into walls.

The cats still love us of course, are always under our feet, and when it is bedtime, they are the first in our bed, warming up the foot spots for us and meowing for us to hurry up and get in there! We thought they might like a little treat of catnip, so we brought some home, and I put some in a few toys and part of a sock and sewed it together into a little ball. Charlie absolutely loved it. He rolled around in it for hours and had a crazy-eyed look about him as he took every toy and bounced it up in the air with his paws. Max, on the other hand, looked dismayed and disgusted with us for bringing home drugs for his brother, and told us that he was above it (I saw him sneak in a few sniffs later on though). They're still obsessed with getting outside, especially with this new white stuff and cold air outside, but I'm hoping that soon that will wear off.

Work has been crazy-busy since it is the start of the semester. Students think that it is okay to apply for a Master's program well into the first week of classes and get angry with me when I tell them that there is no time to process their application in time to register. Actually a lot of students get attitudes with me, but I don't mind because it isn't my fault. I do my job and go well beyond that to help the nice non-attitude ones (as advised to do by a professor), but I can't help if someone doesn't qualify or if the main campus in Blacksburg is slow. Not my bad. So, I still love it. Pete loves his job too, but I think he's glad to be done with chauffeuring and back to couriering. I'd rather it be the other way around so that I could drive to work myself (and I like the bigger paycheck as well) and Pete wouldn't be putting all that wear and tear on our truck and use our money for gas that won't be reimbursed. However, it makes him happy...and for right now he has begun working a little later so that he can drive me into work an hour early so I won't complain about taking the bus and metro in below freezing weather. Good Husband.

Last night we drove through D.C. b/c Pete had to pick up two packages, in the ghetto. The ghetto of all ghettos...and I didn't like it. Neither did Pete, b/c the streets weren't exactly as the map said, so we were lost several times and it was frustrating. Plus I had to pee so bad, I almost made yellow snow in someone's front yard (thankfully I held it but it was painful). I've decided that while I love D.C., that's only the downtown bit with all of the important buildings and newspaper corporations...the rest of it can be thrown away b/c it's dirty, hard to navigate, and not enough public toilets about.

We also bought a new mattress set from Sears as they had a 50% off sale and we're in desperate need of a decent bed so that we can sleep an entire night. I'll tell you more about that later. It's time to get to work.

Summary update

Hey there,

I'm too busy to write a proper update, but I emailed this to someone earlier and thought it was a good way to catch you up on stuff. It repeats some things I have already told you about, but maybe it'll be good to refresh your memory. I also want to add that Peter and I are still extremely happy living on our own, with our two cats, and we have absolutely no regrets about moving up here so quickly.

Anywho, here's your update:

Pete has a job! Two jobs actually, but one is only for this week. Regularly he has been working as a courier, which makes a good supplemental income to mine, however he has to use our truck, putting miles and wear and tear on it and we have to pay for the gas. He loves it, but I'm praying that he will find something just as fun that will wear less on our only vehicle. This week he is working as a chauffeur for inauguration activities. Right now he is the personal chauffeur for a guy who seems to be in charge of communications for the inauguration. He said that the guy is very nice and doesn't seem to mind that Peter is bluffing his way around D.C. - a city he only began driving in on Sunday. He gets to listen in on phone conversations where the guy keeps calling someone in the oval office and says, "I saw you on the news, you looked great! No, no, really, you were fine." Seems interesting. Our landlord, who helped Peter find this job, was Barbara Bush's chauffeur this past weekend, and now is driving the Secret Service around. Can't wait to hear his stories.

Our entire journey and experiences of living here have been a lesson on just how important our faith is and how many ways the Lord shows his love and takes care of us. I have felt and seen His hand in every aspect of our lives here, and I have to say that it is such a beautiful thing to see.

Being kicked out of our house-share before we arrived was the biggest blessing we have received thus far. Because of that eviction, we were forced to move into an apartment that we really couldn't afford, with a deposit that we definitely couldn't afford, and into a situation that now we know that we couldn't afford to lose. Not only has it pushed us into living on our own - for the first time since we were married almost 3 years ago (March 2!) - but the reason Pete is working these two jobs is because of our landlord. The apartment is owned by this very sweet couple from Turkey who just a few years older than us. They decided to move out into a bigger place and rent out their tiny apartment. The day we moved in, the guy, Kagan, noticed that we didn't have any furniture, so he left his desk, microwave, and a couple of other things.

We found a great website where people list furniture and items that they are selling or giving away, and that is where we found a table, two couches, chairs, kitchen items, towels, storage boxes, an iron, and various other household items - all for free. We also went to pick up a bed that someone claimed to be giving away, but it turns out
that they gave us the wrong address, either as a joke or by mistake. Pete called Kagan, our landlord, who immediately knew of somebody giving away a mattress and boxspring. When Pete went to pick it up, the man offered Pete a job as a courier - and he has been happily working in that job since we arrived. As for the rest of the apartment, we found a few things that we needed in thrift shops, and have managed to furnish the entire apartment for $55. Granted, nothing matches, and the bed is similar to sleeping on a bed of nails, but we now have a home that feels like a home, and I can't tell you how happy I am to see the pride and happiness in Peter.

We have had a little trouble coming up with money for rent (due Jan. 20), and have prayed for some way to be able to pay this. Because everything has to go through the main campus of my employer at their campus 4 and 1/2 hours away in Blacksburg, VA, it has taken a while for them to process me as an employee in the system, and thus, send me a paycheck and process my reimbursement for moving (they stated that they would pay the mileage and a per diem for two days' travel). Also, because our bank account here is brand new, it will take a week for Peter's first paycheck to actually go into our account. So to say the least, we have been worried about being able to pay our rent and other half of our deposit (which our landlord has so kindly allowed us to break up into two months) on time. We went to a church here, Truro Episcopal Church in Fairfax, where we sat with the Rector's wife, who is from England. During the sermon, the Rector had us turn to our neighbor and tell them about the time when we "experienced God" and to pray for each other. The Rector's wife seemed concerned for us and she said a special prayer to help us make our rent, and took down our names so that she could continue to pray for us during the week.

Finally, on Friday, I received my first paycheck from Virginia Tech, exactly the amount of rent that is due on Thursday. Isn't God Great? Still praying for the car payment to be made, but at least we still have a place to live.

Well I need to get back to work, this job has a never-ending pile of work and the phone never stops ringing, although I still love it.

So there you go. We're still here, fat, and happy. And Missing y'all. Cheerio!

The Down and Dirty of Real Life

After the first blissful week of living together, DH and I have been hit on the head with a very large This-is-the-real-world boulder - and it hurts!

Mostly, I'm just talking about money. We were given a lot of it in order to move, but that money has been spent. Our own money has been spent, and we've yet to receive proper paychecks in order to spend. The main thing on my mind is being able to pay our rent on the 20th. Our landlord was so nice to allow us to pay only half of the deposit for January, as long as we paid the other half for Feb (due Jan 20). At first I was worried that we might not be able to pay the deposit part...now I'm almost certain we will not be able to pay the rent at all. And it's thanks to my wonderful employer Virginia Tech. They have slacked off so much that I still have yet to receive ANY paycheck from them in the past month, and the $500 that I'm due for relocation expenses probably won't arrive for another month b/c they keep sending the forms back asking for more signatures.

On top of that, our anti-depressant prescriptions are up, and my health insurance still hasn't registered me so that I may reap the benefits of cheap prescriptions. We cannot just go a week or so without these anti-ds, as they tend to make your brain a little psychotically depressed if you suddenly stop taking them. I have been rationing myself, taking them only every other day to save some time, only to result in panic attacks and hour long sobbing breakdowns each day when I return home from work. God Bless my Darling Husband who is there to hold me and allow me to sob and snot up his shirt without guilt. The most common conversation in the evening is, "Why are you crying?" "I don't know, ". I never know when it will hit, don't know exactly what I'm crying about, but if forces me to cry even more over crying over nothing, gives me a terrible headache, and I'm almost out of kleenex. An hour later I am better, sitting on the couch with DH, supper in our laps as we watch my favorite Vicar of Dibley dvds and Father Ted. Soon, once we figure out the code to watch a UK dvd in our American-sod-the-rest-of-the-world DVD player, we will do this to shows of Little Britain thanks to a wonderful sis-in-law. Actually, soon I hope to be able to afford to refill my prescription in order to stop these attacks and breakdowns full stop.

Our kitties are the only ones unaffected by this all, except for the fact that we need to buy more kitty litter and cannot afford it until.. well... March. They are increasingly playful every night, and greet me at the door every evening with loving meows and claws at my legs asking me to pick them up and cuddle my nose into their fur. They are also very talented at giving our bathroom the wonderful aroma of digested kitty food if you know what I mean, and using our bathroom rug to cover the kitty box instead of the litter itself. Such gifted kitties they are.

Today is Peter's Birthday. He finally reached the same age as me, so I hope he'll stop calling me his "old lady." We're both at work, it is a bank holiday for me but I'm working today in order to take some time off later this year, and Pete receives no days off in his line of work. Tonight we're probably going to sit in front of more Father Ted or Dibley or Coupling with our george foreman grilled burgers and oven chips. Pete with a beer and me with a Cherry Coke. Ahhh, the good life. Although I may have painted a depressing picture of our situation, we're still very happy indeed. We have each other, our kitties, and our faith. That's all we really need, the rest is just details. I hate to sum it up in an 80s song, but it came on the radio this morning and we both chimed in, as if singing to each other. So here's our song of the day, Living on a Prayer, by Bon Jovi:

Tommy used to work on the docks
union's been on strike
He's down on his luck - It's tough so tough.

Gina works the diner all day working for her man
She brings home her pay for love for love.

She says: We've got to hold on to what we've got
'Cause it doesn't make a difference if we make it or not.
We've got each other and that's a lot for love -
We'll give it a shot.

We're half way there - Livin' on a prayer
Take my hand and we'll make it I swear
- livin' on a prayer.

Tommy got his six string in hock.
Now he's holding in what he used to make it talk -
So tough it's tough.
Gina dreams of running away when she cries in the night

Tommy whispers: Baby it's okay someday.
We've got to hold on to what we've got . . .
We're half way there - Livin' on a prayer . . .

We've got to hold on ready or not
You live for the fight when it's all that you've got.
We're half way there - Livin' on a prayer . . .
We're half way there - Livin' on a prayer . . .
We're half way there - Livin' on a prayer

Update in a letter

I'm not really this angry, just imagine my dry-humor when reading this. I'm too lazy to properly update, so here's part of a letter I sent to my old college roommate Tammie who I had dinner with Friday night in response to a PMSy email she had sent me...

I rode the bus today for the first time to get to work, in the States that is. I miss my 17 Wokingham Road bus, I knew exactly how much it took, the driver was friendly, and there were conversations that I could listen in on. Not the 3A bus from Annandale to East Falls Church metro. Apparently you mustn't speak english on this bus or you will be stared at and talked about in Spanish and Korean for the entire trip. If you can't get your dollar in the machine right away, the driver will sigh and roll his eyes at you. And I walk too slow once getting off the bus and going into the metro. What are these people rushing for? Aren't they just going to work? Who wants to rush to work? Wackos.

Did you hear Jen and Brad (anniston and Pitt) broke up? What the hell is up with that? Why can't we have one freakin' hollywood couple to show us that marriage works? Why not just one? It'd make up for all the other freakishly wrong morals they're teaching with all the stuff they get away with. It's their fault that people look at Pete and I thinking, "I give them two more years, then it's a nasty divorce with him sleeping with her best friend." Bastids.

Sorry, I should be cheerful. I'm at work, and I'm the only one here. And I love this job. Haven't seen any office politics yet, but there is still time. Oh, and taking the metro was a bit embarrassing, b/c everyone was taking the metro the other way, so I had to stand there alone on the other side of the platform while two metro thingys came by and picked up loads of people, staring out the window at me like I'm a lost little girl. Well guess what bastids, I got a seat on MY metro, hah! Taking it one stop seems pointless too, I want less bus and more metro. And there's a big firetruckin' hill from the station to my work, it's "right next door" but what they don't tell you is that it's past the humungous parking lot and up two gigantic hills. I better have lost some freaking weight after a few months of doing this. All that for $2.60 and an hour's commute time when it takes 15 minutes to drive it. I wish Pete would get a job where I can be spoiled and driven to work by him or be able to drive myself again. He gets paid Wednesday, where we will find out if it's worth it him ruining our truck to be a courier or not.

We ate at IHOP last night in Fairfax b/c I had a coupon. I felt like an old person with a coupon to eat at a place like Ihop. I was craving chicken fingers and french toast, is that a weird combination? Well I settled for chicken fried steak and pancakes. It was lovely, really. I felt sorry for the waiter and tipped him a little extra. Not that I can afford it, but I just wanted to be nice to him.

Time for some tea and back to work, see you later,
Ash