Wednesday, February 04, 2004

An email from Slush

RE: My life plan

Ash,

Screw the diets, I have an even better plan. When I finish law school I'll become rich, you'll write a book about me and we'll both be rich. What do rich people do? Surgery! We'll get sucked into skinny, and by the time all of our skinny bitch friends are plump from motherhood and rubbing over-priced lotion onto their stretch marks, we'll flaunt our popsicle stick bodies with big boobs and rub it IN THEIR FACES! Mwahahahahahahahaha!

So put that cabbage down and crack a window, you smell awful. Come over and help me finish this cake. Actually, come over and bring another cake for you to eat, I'm not sharing this one.

P.S. Did I mention I'll get lots of sex?

P.P.S. Bring some whiskey too.
Love you,
Slush