Operation Grow Lucky Blighter - Week 5 (or 3 or 6 :/ )
Hormones suck.
Yesterday, after learning that I was almost fired for doing something forgetful in my madness, I went home and bawled on the phone to my Mommy while a bowl of ice cream melted in my lap. I cried for so long that I had one of those raised blood pressure headaches that lasted allllllll night. It was so horrible I don't think I'll cry ever again. Everytime I feel those tears, I remember that horrible, horrible headache and hold them back.
Pete, my DH, is in for a wild ride. Not only has he had to put up with my depression and monthly hormone moods, but he gets this as well. Somehow he smiles through it all, hugs me and dreams of his days as "Daddy". He has learned that one way to cheer me up or get my mind off of the cramps (still got 'em!) and nausea (although no vomiting yet, thanks God!) is to imagine what the little lucky Phelps-Sperm-Egg-Embryo will be like.
Yesterday we fell asleep brainstorming names. Pete nixed some of my favorites, Amelia, Amelie (heh), Madeline/Madelyn (I wanted to call her Maddie!), and Emma - but we agreed on simpler names such as Amy, Emily, Jamie, Margaret (Maggie! and it's Mama Sue's middle name), and Rebecca (Reba for short). Of course we'll change our minds a million times but it's fun to namestorm, especially when you have an actual excuse this time. For boys, Toby, Benjamin (my dad's middle name and Pete loves it), Matthew, Andrew... and a few others but I've forgotten them by now. See? We'll do this again and again I'm sure and by the name the naming process comes, our minds will go blank.
Oh, forgot our favorite - Kashdis. Just think of it. Kashdis Spencer. (say it out loud, heh.) or Pezdis. Heh. If we lived in England we'd name a boy Mark Sand Spencer. Heeh.
Back to the dirty truth of pregnancy - it's still a bitch. But I'm gradually beginning to view it as a happy event. I'm not crazy about the pooing yellow/gray baby poo every 10 minutes, or the miniscule peeing every 5 minutes, the cramps that I would kill to stop, and the backaches that keep me from sleeping at night - but I like... aw hell I don't like any damn thing about it right now. Well, I do like the fact that I'm creating a mini-Pete, and turning goofy Pete into goofy-Dad-Pete, and I love his enthusiasm and support. I just wish I could love how it is destroying my already destroyed body.
Yesterday, after learning that I was almost fired for doing something forgetful in my madness, I went home and bawled on the phone to my Mommy while a bowl of ice cream melted in my lap. I cried for so long that I had one of those raised blood pressure headaches that lasted allllllll night. It was so horrible I don't think I'll cry ever again. Everytime I feel those tears, I remember that horrible, horrible headache and hold them back.
Pete, my DH, is in for a wild ride. Not only has he had to put up with my depression and monthly hormone moods, but he gets this as well. Somehow he smiles through it all, hugs me and dreams of his days as "Daddy". He has learned that one way to cheer me up or get my mind off of the cramps (still got 'em!) and nausea (although no vomiting yet, thanks God!) is to imagine what the little lucky Phelps-Sperm-Egg-Embryo will be like.
Yesterday we fell asleep brainstorming names. Pete nixed some of my favorites, Amelia, Amelie (heh), Madeline/Madelyn (I wanted to call her Maddie!), and Emma - but we agreed on simpler names such as Amy, Emily, Jamie, Margaret (Maggie! and it's Mama Sue's middle name), and Rebecca (Reba for short). Of course we'll change our minds a million times but it's fun to namestorm, especially when you have an actual excuse this time. For boys, Toby, Benjamin (my dad's middle name and Pete loves it), Matthew, Andrew... and a few others but I've forgotten them by now. See? We'll do this again and again I'm sure and by the name the naming process comes, our minds will go blank.
Oh, forgot our favorite - Kashdis. Just think of it. Kashdis Spencer. (say it out loud, heh.) or Pezdis. Heh. If we lived in England we'd name a boy Mark Sand Spencer. Heeh.
Back to the dirty truth of pregnancy - it's still a bitch. But I'm gradually beginning to view it as a happy event. I'm not crazy about the pooing yellow/gray baby poo every 10 minutes, or the miniscule peeing every 5 minutes, the cramps that I would kill to stop, and the backaches that keep me from sleeping at night - but I like... aw hell I don't like any damn thing about it right now. Well, I do like the fact that I'm creating a mini-Pete, and turning goofy Pete into goofy-Dad-Pete, and I love his enthusiasm and support. I just wish I could love how it is destroying my already destroyed body.
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