This is a looooooong one
A little story about how this guy and I became to be friends:
I have tell y'all about my new friend. I met him a while ago but didn't really give him the benefit of the doubt and didn't trust him with a friendship for a long time. It wasn't until recently that I've been realizing just how good this friend is to me, and like most people when we encounter something new and exciting, I just want to share it with you.
It was C. who introduced him to me a while back when I was younger. He was with us in Mississippi and I completely ignored him, but didn't mind when he bought me lunch or made my parents smile. C. was totally in love with him and I thought b/c of that, she was the biggest goober I've ever met. I still let her be my friend but whenever she talked about him, I'd smile, nod my head and throw away any words she said about him. I thought it was just some sort of new crush that brainwashes people when they think they love somebody. I thought he could brainwash anybody.
I met him again when I came back from England. He had been over there too, but didn't hang out in my circle of friends. Pete and I just didn't hang with those people. We'd rather drink, smoke substances and waste our money on useless possessions; that wasn't his kind of crowd. When I came back from England the second time, married, unemployed and rejected by the country where my husband lived, I was a wreck. I needed a good friend, and I had nobody nearby. I saw him again in Baton Rouge, and thought, "Dayum he sure does like to travel." I had a few conversations with him but was scared. I didn't know him too well, and the fact that he made everybody who knew him fall in love with him kinda scared me. I already had one love in my life, I didn't need two! I backed off and let my stress take over without any friends to help ease the burden. I had a nervous breakdown, injuring myself and got to the point where my Mother couldn't ignore it anymore. She made me go to the doc and get some drugs. Something to help ease my mind. I did, and it helped, but I still felt empty inside. I needed some friends, my husband, and some way to take the stress off.
I took yoga, and enjoyed it. I did it every morning for fifteen minutes and every night for twenty. I was feeling better about myself and my husband was going to come visit soon. I thought all of my problems were going to end. I still didn't have a job, but that was the least of my problems. Apparently the job thing wasn't so little though. My parents were out of jobs and they needed money to pay the mortgage. Pete and I were in so much debt ourselves that we couldn't make it either. We didn't know what to do. And I still didn't have any friends in Baton Rouge, none that I felt close to.
Then he called me. He said that he knew I was having trouble, and that he'd like to meet Pete. He asked me to take him to his house over the weekend and he would help me out. I didn't believe it, but it was free and something to do, so on Sunday (because Saturday is made for sleeping all day) we went. He introduced me to a few people, and right away I felt relieved. One was named Carol. She worked at LSU helping find jobs for graduates. Another was a lawyer who knew of some immigration lawyers that could help us. Then there was him of course, who said he'd help me find peace. A strange thing if you ask me for some stranger to say, but the conversation was so weird that I decided to just go with it and see what happened.
"Give me your burdens, and I will give you rest."
"Huh? Give you my what?!? I dont need rest! I slept all day yesterday, what are you talking about? I need a job! I need money! I need my husband to be able to stay here!" I was alarmed at the audacity of his claims.
"Don't worry, I will worry for you." Well, okay. I said I'd let him worry for me, but how do you do that? How is it possible to just stop worrying and give it to someone else? You can't trust them to make sure your bills will get paid, put food on the table and make sure you and your parents won't be homeless. Nobody can take care of you but you! That was my motto and I was stickin' to it... but I said okay anyway. If he thought that he could help me by agreeing to give him my worries, then I gave them to him. I told him about every bill I had, every worry I ever felt since the day I was born, everytime I cried about missing Pete, and about every time I felt like a failure when my bank account went in the red. I told him everything. And it didn't just stop there. Pete and I went back home and enjoyed our vacation. He left and I was alone, lost and broken again. But I remembered his words, and thought I'd give it a go again. I starting calling him every night and have long conversations with him. I'd tell him about all of my worries, how much I missed Pete, that I wished something could guarantee Pete's safety over there where I couldn't reach him, and that I didn't want my parents to be homeless b/c they were supporting me. He listened, he listened hard and he didn't say much. He let me rant and rave and cry and shout to him and he just absorbed it all in. When I was too tired to think about it anymore, I'd go to bed. And I slept. I slept peacefully, and after a while I began to believe that maybe he DID take my worries from me.
About a week later I got a call for a temporary job working with the government elections. The company that provided the voting machines needed locals to help with tech support. The temp agency didn't have many people with my kind of experience and they needed me. Now. They paid $15 an hour, would that be all right? I would've worked 20 hours a day for them if they let me. I had a job, I had something to get my mind off of Pete, and I could pay my parents' mortgage! Not only that, but they sent me across the state, to my old hometown, paid for my travel and put me up in a hotel room. I had time away from my parents, time to spend with my old high school friends, and I was getting paid to be a computer nerd. It couldn't have been better. As soon as I got back to Baton Rouge and wrote the check for my parents mortgage, I called him up and thanked him. I don't know how he had anything to do with it, but I knew that I should just thank him for getting me to that point of being happy again. He didn't say "you're welcome", he just listened and smiled. He said to continue giving him my worries and I'll be okay. So I did.
A year later Pete came to the States on a visa. We could finally be a married couple again. He couldn't work yet, but I had a permanent job with an airline, my dream job. I got my own office, business cards, and a place to go in between the hours of 9 and 5 for five days a week. I was extremely happy. I started paying off my bills that have been accumulating for the past year. I was able to buy Pete presents and take him out to dinner. We went to Florida with my family and spent a week on the beach. All seemed okay. Or so I thought. I lost my job because they couldn't afford me anymore, Pete was getting antsy about being bored in a new country with no friends and nothing to do, my dog got run over, and my dad had a stroke. I was lost again. I was about to lose it and injure myself once again, but he called me just in the nick of time.
"Why don't you come over Wednesday night? I'm having some friends over and I'm providing supper. Bring your husband."
A dinner party with new people who could also be potential friends? "You're on," I said. I couldn't pass up free food, and Pete couldn't pass up the opportunity to meet new people. We went, and these new people were lovely. They loved him too, and I could see it in their eyes and their words. What was it that charmed over these people to such a degree? I wondered why I hadn't been charmed like that. I always treated him like a shelf friend. I put him on a shelf when I didn't want to be bothered with communicating with him, and took him off when I needed something. These people didn't do that. They were true friends, and I could see that they received a true friendship in return. I wanted that. I craved it. I'm an attention-seeker, and crave any type of love. I wanted his love. So I sought it.
I started being a true friend to him again. I vowed never to put him on the shelf anymore. Pete fell for him too. No, not in that way, but he was charmed by his personality and giving and loving attitude. I asked Pete why, and he said, "Why not?" True. Why not? So I did. I loved with all my heart and I trusted him with my worries again. I told him when I was happy and told him when I was sad, and it immediately started paying off. He cheered me up, helped me out and picked me up when I was down. He gave Pete the confidence to start playing guitar in front of people, and helped me find another permanent job helping out with Foster children. He fast became our best friend, and we see him everyday now. His help didn't stop there though.
Just in the past two weeks I have realized just how amazing he really is. Pete and I have been down again, financially. We share a truck that needs tires so badly that if we drive it on a wet road, the back wheels fishtail with every curve. The license tag expired two months ago and will cost $675.00 to renew. Pete lost his job and although I filed bankruptcy, creditors are starting sue me and ask for more money. I've been overwhelmed with worry, then I remember my friend. I called him again and told him about it. I told him everything, even the things I've been ashamed of, and things that I thought would make him hate me. But he didn't. He said that he loves me and will do anything it takes to help me as long as I ask him. "All you have to do is ask," he says to me, all the time. So I asked. And I've had this incredible peace from it too. I don't have the money to fix any of these things, I'm still driving the expired death trap, and I haven't begun to think about the consequences of being sued, but I'm not worried in the least. I know that he'll help me, because that's what he does best. I asked, so he has to help me now. And it's already working.
A couple let us housesit for them to get away from my parents. They have a Golden Retriever who puts a smile on our face daily, and likes to go swimming with us in their pool. They left one of their cars while we were out of town so that we can drive that. They also left a check for $300 to pay for the insurance class Pete needs in order to start this new job. Another couple gave us $200 cash to pay for gas to get Pete to this class in New Orleans, once they found out that he had to miss one day b/c we couldn't afford the gas. They're also donating ties and nice clothes for him to wear when he does start working. And it's all because of my friend. He introduced me to these people, and asked them to help me, so they did. They love him so much that they treat Pete and I like their family, which we are. All of his friends are a family. He has so much love to give everyone, that we're all a family but without the drama and heartache. It's wonderful. So wonderful that I wanted to share him with you. I just can't tell you how much I feel loved just by knowing him now. I can't describe the peace I have, despite all of the problems I'm facing at this point. All I can tell you is that his name is Jesus, and he wants to be your friend too. All you have to do is ask.
A little story about how this guy and I became to be friends:
I have tell y'all about my new friend. I met him a while ago but didn't really give him the benefit of the doubt and didn't trust him with a friendship for a long time. It wasn't until recently that I've been realizing just how good this friend is to me, and like most people when we encounter something new and exciting, I just want to share it with you.
It was C. who introduced him to me a while back when I was younger. He was with us in Mississippi and I completely ignored him, but didn't mind when he bought me lunch or made my parents smile. C. was totally in love with him and I thought b/c of that, she was the biggest goober I've ever met. I still let her be my friend but whenever she talked about him, I'd smile, nod my head and throw away any words she said about him. I thought it was just some sort of new crush that brainwashes people when they think they love somebody. I thought he could brainwash anybody.
I met him again when I came back from England. He had been over there too, but didn't hang out in my circle of friends. Pete and I just didn't hang with those people. We'd rather drink, smoke substances and waste our money on useless possessions; that wasn't his kind of crowd. When I came back from England the second time, married, unemployed and rejected by the country where my husband lived, I was a wreck. I needed a good friend, and I had nobody nearby. I saw him again in Baton Rouge, and thought, "Dayum he sure does like to travel." I had a few conversations with him but was scared. I didn't know him too well, and the fact that he made everybody who knew him fall in love with him kinda scared me. I already had one love in my life, I didn't need two! I backed off and let my stress take over without any friends to help ease the burden. I had a nervous breakdown, injuring myself and got to the point where my Mother couldn't ignore it anymore. She made me go to the doc and get some drugs. Something to help ease my mind. I did, and it helped, but I still felt empty inside. I needed some friends, my husband, and some way to take the stress off.
I took yoga, and enjoyed it. I did it every morning for fifteen minutes and every night for twenty. I was feeling better about myself and my husband was going to come visit soon. I thought all of my problems were going to end. I still didn't have a job, but that was the least of my problems. Apparently the job thing wasn't so little though. My parents were out of jobs and they needed money to pay the mortgage. Pete and I were in so much debt ourselves that we couldn't make it either. We didn't know what to do. And I still didn't have any friends in Baton Rouge, none that I felt close to.
Then he called me. He said that he knew I was having trouble, and that he'd like to meet Pete. He asked me to take him to his house over the weekend and he would help me out. I didn't believe it, but it was free and something to do, so on Sunday (because Saturday is made for sleeping all day) we went. He introduced me to a few people, and right away I felt relieved. One was named Carol. She worked at LSU helping find jobs for graduates. Another was a lawyer who knew of some immigration lawyers that could help us. Then there was him of course, who said he'd help me find peace. A strange thing if you ask me for some stranger to say, but the conversation was so weird that I decided to just go with it and see what happened.
"Give me your burdens, and I will give you rest."
"Huh? Give you my what?!? I dont need rest! I slept all day yesterday, what are you talking about? I need a job! I need money! I need my husband to be able to stay here!" I was alarmed at the audacity of his claims.
"Don't worry, I will worry for you." Well, okay. I said I'd let him worry for me, but how do you do that? How is it possible to just stop worrying and give it to someone else? You can't trust them to make sure your bills will get paid, put food on the table and make sure you and your parents won't be homeless. Nobody can take care of you but you! That was my motto and I was stickin' to it... but I said okay anyway. If he thought that he could help me by agreeing to give him my worries, then I gave them to him. I told him about every bill I had, every worry I ever felt since the day I was born, everytime I cried about missing Pete, and about every time I felt like a failure when my bank account went in the red. I told him everything. And it didn't just stop there. Pete and I went back home and enjoyed our vacation. He left and I was alone, lost and broken again. But I remembered his words, and thought I'd give it a go again. I starting calling him every night and have long conversations with him. I'd tell him about all of my worries, how much I missed Pete, that I wished something could guarantee Pete's safety over there where I couldn't reach him, and that I didn't want my parents to be homeless b/c they were supporting me. He listened, he listened hard and he didn't say much. He let me rant and rave and cry and shout to him and he just absorbed it all in. When I was too tired to think about it anymore, I'd go to bed. And I slept. I slept peacefully, and after a while I began to believe that maybe he DID take my worries from me.
About a week later I got a call for a temporary job working with the government elections. The company that provided the voting machines needed locals to help with tech support. The temp agency didn't have many people with my kind of experience and they needed me. Now. They paid $15 an hour, would that be all right? I would've worked 20 hours a day for them if they let me. I had a job, I had something to get my mind off of Pete, and I could pay my parents' mortgage! Not only that, but they sent me across the state, to my old hometown, paid for my travel and put me up in a hotel room. I had time away from my parents, time to spend with my old high school friends, and I was getting paid to be a computer nerd. It couldn't have been better. As soon as I got back to Baton Rouge and wrote the check for my parents mortgage, I called him up and thanked him. I don't know how he had anything to do with it, but I knew that I should just thank him for getting me to that point of being happy again. He didn't say "you're welcome", he just listened and smiled. He said to continue giving him my worries and I'll be okay. So I did.
A year later Pete came to the States on a visa. We could finally be a married couple again. He couldn't work yet, but I had a permanent job with an airline, my dream job. I got my own office, business cards, and a place to go in between the hours of 9 and 5 for five days a week. I was extremely happy. I started paying off my bills that have been accumulating for the past year. I was able to buy Pete presents and take him out to dinner. We went to Florida with my family and spent a week on the beach. All seemed okay. Or so I thought. I lost my job because they couldn't afford me anymore, Pete was getting antsy about being bored in a new country with no friends and nothing to do, my dog got run over, and my dad had a stroke. I was lost again. I was about to lose it and injure myself once again, but he called me just in the nick of time.
"Why don't you come over Wednesday night? I'm having some friends over and I'm providing supper. Bring your husband."
A dinner party with new people who could also be potential friends? "You're on," I said. I couldn't pass up free food, and Pete couldn't pass up the opportunity to meet new people. We went, and these new people were lovely. They loved him too, and I could see it in their eyes and their words. What was it that charmed over these people to such a degree? I wondered why I hadn't been charmed like that. I always treated him like a shelf friend. I put him on a shelf when I didn't want to be bothered with communicating with him, and took him off when I needed something. These people didn't do that. They were true friends, and I could see that they received a true friendship in return. I wanted that. I craved it. I'm an attention-seeker, and crave any type of love. I wanted his love. So I sought it.
I started being a true friend to him again. I vowed never to put him on the shelf anymore. Pete fell for him too. No, not in that way, but he was charmed by his personality and giving and loving attitude. I asked Pete why, and he said, "Why not?" True. Why not? So I did. I loved with all my heart and I trusted him with my worries again. I told him when I was happy and told him when I was sad, and it immediately started paying off. He cheered me up, helped me out and picked me up when I was down. He gave Pete the confidence to start playing guitar in front of people, and helped me find another permanent job helping out with Foster children. He fast became our best friend, and we see him everyday now. His help didn't stop there though.
Just in the past two weeks I have realized just how amazing he really is. Pete and I have been down again, financially. We share a truck that needs tires so badly that if we drive it on a wet road, the back wheels fishtail with every curve. The license tag expired two months ago and will cost $675.00 to renew. Pete lost his job and although I filed bankruptcy, creditors are starting sue me and ask for more money. I've been overwhelmed with worry, then I remember my friend. I called him again and told him about it. I told him everything, even the things I've been ashamed of, and things that I thought would make him hate me. But he didn't. He said that he loves me and will do anything it takes to help me as long as I ask him. "All you have to do is ask," he says to me, all the time. So I asked. And I've had this incredible peace from it too. I don't have the money to fix any of these things, I'm still driving the expired death trap, and I haven't begun to think about the consequences of being sued, but I'm not worried in the least. I know that he'll help me, because that's what he does best. I asked, so he has to help me now. And it's already working.
A couple let us housesit for them to get away from my parents. They have a Golden Retriever who puts a smile on our face daily, and likes to go swimming with us in their pool. They left one of their cars while we were out of town so that we can drive that. They also left a check for $300 to pay for the insurance class Pete needs in order to start this new job. Another couple gave us $200 cash to pay for gas to get Pete to this class in New Orleans, once they found out that he had to miss one day b/c we couldn't afford the gas. They're also donating ties and nice clothes for him to wear when he does start working. And it's all because of my friend. He introduced me to these people, and asked them to help me, so they did. They love him so much that they treat Pete and I like their family, which we are. All of his friends are a family. He has so much love to give everyone, that we're all a family but without the drama and heartache. It's wonderful. So wonderful that I wanted to share him with you. I just can't tell you how much I feel loved just by knowing him now. I can't describe the peace I have, despite all of the problems I'm facing at this point. All I can tell you is that his name is Jesus, and he wants to be your friend too. All you have to do is ask.
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